If only I wasn't afraid of making mistakes...

http://www.nytimes.com/2007/11/24/business/24shortcuts.html

Excerpt from:

The Many Errors in Thinking About Mistakes 

..... excerpt...
“Studies with children and adults show that a large percentage cannot tolerate mistakes or setbacks,” she said. In particular, those who believe that intelligence is fixed and cannot change tend to avoid taking chances that may lead to errors.

Often parents and teachers unwittingly encourage this mind-set by praising children for being smart rather than for trying hard or struggling with the process.

For example, in a study that Professor Dweck and her researchers did with 400 fifth graders, half were randomly praised as being “really smart” for doing well on a test; the others were praised for their effort.

Then they were given two tasks to choose from: an easy one that they would learn little from but do well, or a more challenging one that might be more interesting but induce more mistakes.

The majority of those praised for being smart chose the simple task, while 90 percent of those commended for trying hard selected the more difficult one.

The difference was surprising, Professor Dweck said, especially because it came from one sentence of praise.

------------------
O_O The former one sounds like me. Seriously. I already realize that I always do that, but to have it spelled out so plainly before me....



DO READ THE ARTICLE!! IT'S VERY INTERESTING & I'm sure that it's applicable to many of us. Here;s the link again:
 http://www.nytimes.com/2007/11/24/business/24shortcuts.html

Other interesting links:
www.pbs.org/saf/1101/segments/1101-2.htm
(Research on how intelligence changes as people study and learn)


Psychology research showing that when students view intelligence is malleable, they have more confidence and their performance improves:
http://chronicle.com/article/Carol-Dwecks-Attitude/65405/

Suzumiya Haruhi No Yuutsu (Review) + extras

bouken desho desho!? honto ga uso ni kawaru sekai de
yume ga aru kara tsuyoku naru no yo dare no tame janai 
~ The Melancholy of Suzumiya Haruhi, OP~

Anyway I'm back in the states, living off campus, have cooking shifts with housemates Rong & Pong (both Thai girls-a junior n a senior), struggling with keeping up with homework even though i take only 3 classes because i'm so inefficient in managing time, i still want to watch lots of anime (effect of summer), its getting cold so soon, I like being a sophomore, i'm still struggling with escapism, i need to pull my socks up, i need to get my priorities right, i like my life in general, there are many areas in need of improving and my efforts, i musn't neglect my family and friends (in malaysia n here), i should be more courageous n less shy, more polite, more sensitive to others needs. also should exercise more.

Anyways here's a snippet of my diary on days which i watch anime.

FALL QUARTER 2010
sept 25 sat (1st weekend of school year)
1.SPAC cardio blast
2.MSD lunch Najib came to NY teleconferencing. met Nadia, Bernice, Hafiz, Nigel, Hafizah, Khairul etc.
3.H.I.S audition :)
4.Esther's room at 1835 Hinman
5.Busou Renkin ep2
6.suzumiya Haruhi ep12 live a life, ep 11 the day of sagittarius, ep 9 someday in the rain :)

sept 28 tues
cooked red/green bayam and steamed ground pork (pork was unexpectedly a hugee success :) and so easy to make!)
aa megami sama ep1 for dinner

oct 1 fri
used bike sale T.T
bought northwestern purple sweatshirt from norris with nadia
tour around campus
tech lib, orgo ta office hours
orgo gsw- christina duB
tech lib
cilipadi dinner at olive mountain
strawberry yoghurt+authentic japanese green tea ice cream
busou renkin ep3-4
suzumiya haruhi part ep12, ep13, 10, 14 :)
god knows.mp3, bouken desho desho.mp3

oct 2, sat

jewel groceries

dinner at boom;s

busou renkin 5

aa megami sama 2

nodame 1, 4-11fin. very peaceful lol. sleep at 4am x.x

p/s Rong said Pong said she heard me laughing in the middle of the night. lol

oct 3, sun

morning call from pami

rearrange furniture in room

trattoria demi gift cert ($25) 'free lunch' with rong and tee jin

sheil mass 5pm, sheil Big Spaghetti dinner

Aaron come to fix wireless - yay

If you're wondering what's my regular anime now, it's Busou Renkin. will offer my views later on.

And here comes the awaited- or not- Haruhi review! written in the middle of the night after rewatching some Haruhi episodes on Friday night.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Busou Renkin and Suzumiya Haruhi No Yuutsu were the 1st anime i decided to watch after getting back to the States. I wanted to watch something light after heavy (kind of) Busou Renkin.

I managed to finish Suzumiya Haruhi in 4-5 sessions!
I felt like doing it before school really started because the OP gave me a "holiday feeling".

At first I didn't really like it...i thought the first ep was totally weird, and filler episodes
felt meaningless, and i was put off by the weird order of episodes.

I was never a huge fan of sci-fi. But nevertheless it started getting interesting when

POSSIBLE SPOILER ALERT

the characters started discussing Haruhi's identity. It was interesting. I thought it was a unique idea. (I'm not familiar with sci fi, just speaking from what i read/watched before). I really think it's unique! The character of Haruhi may seem uncommon, but there are people with Haruhi's personality existing in real life & I certainly could relate very much to Kyon. yeah like Haruhi not listening to others was really annoying (that is one of my pet-peeves, btw grrr) =.=|| Nagato Yuki, Asahina Mikuru, and Koizumi were pretty typical cliche characters, and their identities seemed pretty cliched at first, but I liked it that they all formed (perhaps except Koizumi) human relationships (with Kyon I suppose), and they did play proper roles in the plot & were not just plain convenient or harem-filler characters.

GROWING SPOILER ALERT

However, I think the strongest point and the really strong line threading together the messed-up episodes was Kyon's S.A.N.I.T.Y. There's nothing special about his matter-of-fact narration throughout the series - but somehow, or precisely, BECAUSE it was so ORDINARY and li2 shuo3 dang1 ran2 that it was something that ANYBODY (or everybody who is NORMAL) would THINK and FEEL and SAY about all the events happening - it related the ordinary person to the illogicality and absurdness of Suzumiya Haruhi's world.

Concerning Kyon, I'm truly impressed by how matter-of-fact, sound/sensible, and socially rounded he remains even when stuck with Haruhi the one who breaks all regular social norms and values without a care. I guess this is what you would call someone with high EQ?

RED SPOILER WARNING/ALERT

I also really liked the moments when Haruhi shows her normal human side to Kyon. It's so incredibly comforting to know that Haruhi isn't a mysterious being or a god but just a normal human with feelings and thoughts. I liked it when she explained how she felt about the insignificance of the human existence. (the scenes shown were really good i think). Regularly ppl won't think too much about it. E.g. for me, I don't really care about comparing myself to 100 million or billion others who are doing the same thing as i am doing. As long as I'm having fun I really don't think that's a problem at all. The first time I watched it I was impressed that this girl would be so deeply affected until she changed her whole life and made herself (i guess it's not fair to say that?) became miserable and melancholy. (like "eat too full nothing to do" lol). The second time I watched it, I thought, well, she could choose to run away from home and not live an ordinary student life? or she could go and live with some tribal or little-known people in the Amazon or Peninsular Malaysia or the Gobi desert. But I guess she can't do that due to family ties haha. She IS a normal human being after all, in that sense.

Continue about Kyon. His harem is interesting. All the girls like him, but they never go head over heels or fluster (we must remember that Mikuru-chan flusters all the time) over him, but treat him, just normal. It's also understandable why they like him. (because he stood up for them/defied her?/) [girls like guys who can give them a sense of security, am i right?] Kyon himself treats them normally, not with excessive kindness, but how an ordinary kind person would act. He can also control his lust over Mikuru-moeness, which makes him ordinary (and not a bashful harem guy). But I think what is most interesting is how he doesn't exactly fall in love with Haruhi. Really. Do you think he did? (Don't tell me if you think he did, coz that would damage my ego lol). And it's so interesting with the XX he did in episode The Melancholy of Suzumiya VI, which was not like he did it out of (insert shoujo manga term).

Now let us go into the order of the episodes. I kind of messed up the order in which i watched. The fansubbers (i suppose) did it in the broadcast order (which is messed up), and I got annoyed by ep 5 or 6 so I went and looked up the correct/chronological order. So I think thsi was how i watched it:

01 Asahina Mikuru's Adventure - 06 Lone Island Syndrome Part 1
(then modified order)
08 Lone Island Syndrome Part 2. 07 Mysterious Sign. 10,13,14 The Melancholy of Suzumiya Haruhi IV, V, VI.
12 Live a Life, 11 The Day of Sagittarius, 9 Someday in the Rain.

For some reason I thought that ep9 was supposed to be the final ep (misleading preview?). But chronoligcally is correct.

Anyway my order meant that i finished the main plot first before some filler stuff. Which was an interesting perspective. I really felt for Haruhi in ep12 (Live a Life) when she was singing God Knows, which i thought was totally directed at ep14 (Melancholy VI).


SPOILER WARNING END-----------------



I thought that I might've done the order of the episodes a little better though. Not so messed up, but leaving some important details until the very end (as an online commenter said) makes it fun!

So here's my personal order (for ppl who find being chronologically messed up is annoying, but would still enjoy some degree of Haruhi-style fun)

(episode numbers are broadcast episode numbers)
02, 03, 04, 05, 06, 08, 07, 10, 11/01, 09, 12, 13, 14?, 12.
or maybe
01, 02, 03, 05, 04, 06, 08, 07, 11, 09, 12, 13, 14.

01 is the most annoying one. some ppl might like it, but some ppl would really be put off (like wth is going on?!!! when they first watch haruhi. but maybe that's an intended effet. it should come before 09 though.

Well please share your thoughts on the episode order with me. Or on the series in general. (As if anybody would, hah =P)

I also like the OP, ED alot :) And paying attention to Haruhi's voice actress Hirano Aya, i think she deserves the attention she got. (it must be pretty tiring and emotionally stressful to be Haruhi IMO lol). She conveys Haruhi's forcefulness and emotionally unstableness so well. And i really enjoyed her singing for the rock concert in the anime.

All in all I think Suzumiya Haruhi is a series worth watching. It's pretty refreshing, and it offers deep ideas without bogging you down with depressing darkness as some series like to do.


---

Ouch

Today I was at a pharmacy with my parents. A salesgirl came up to me and asked, "Berapa bulan dah?"
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
I graciously answered, "Ini gemuklah..."

...................................


TT___TT

..................................
Hope this joke made your day. XSK (咸湿哭）

这个故事纯属真人真事XSK
This was what happened to me today. Sad!

My mum kept laughing at me.......

wuwu...........T_T

it is a sign....a sign....

waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Summer Anime (what i've been watching)

I finished Nodame Cantabile season 1 last night (friday night) =)

Very Satisfied with the ending. and looking forward to more!

This summer I've been watching School Rumble Season 2, but the first half of the season couldn't make me laugh like Season 1 did - the episodes were all just lame parodies and no serious character development (there's retardation, even......like Tenma swt). Then suddenly around ep 17,18? everybody started developing at a rapid rate, and I was really pleased by the arc - even though everything was ridiculously illogical in retrospect. That's what School Rumble is though. Ridiculously Uber Misunderstandings. And I really can't figure out who will end up with who in the end!!?? Tenma with Karasuma or Harima? Harima with Tenma, Yakumo, or Sawachika? Yakumo with ?? I'd prefer Tenma x Karasuma (coz both of them are so absurd and impossible to figure out) and Harima with Yakumo... i generally don't like the Sawachika-type....though there's a high chance of her ending up with Harima. Aih the Goukai (misunderstanding, misunderstood) Queen and King. What will happen of them?!

So anyway backto what i was going to say...uh yea! School Rumble was lame and couldn't make me laugh .  I didn't feel like watching Bleach or Tantei Gakuen either (not very laughable anime =.=), so I ran out of anime, and decided to download Nodame, which I had wanted to watch for quite some time! And summer is the perfeect time!

Every Nodame episode makes me laugh like crazy. Nodame made me laugh straight from the heart. I love Nodame's drawling speech (though usually drawls annoy me). I also loved how they described classical music with imagery and stories in a way that anyone could understand. I wish i had the privilege of watching Nodame or La Corda when i was younger and had not given up on piano. Then maybe i would 've realized that my strong point was my ear, and then i might've been able to learn piano better if i listened to the songs (i wouldn't have had the guts to ask my piano teacher for those nor would i have thought of internet resources though ^^ll). And perhaps, from La Corda, I would've been more inspired to practice until i could play well.

I'm not making myself look good. Really, one of the reasons I hated practicing piano (besides just plain laziness) was because I couldn't figure out what was going on when i excruciatingly sight read the notes. I was weak with timing, which made me unable to see or hear the melody, and that was very discouraging, and I felt it was meaningless playing. But then, when it was a song that I knew or heard before or the tune was easier to hear, I was able to play much better (though my technique - like timing and fingering - was still really bad). For example, Fur Elise, Santa Lucia, a baroque piece i played for an exam. Because i was able to see where i was going, I wanted to play so i could hear the music.

aaaaaaagh i'm never gonna get to the point at this rate.

I wanted to talk about the last ep and the last part of Nodame.

I loved the anime from the beginning, but I felt especially touched since Chiaki/Stresemann's Rachmaninoff Piano Concerto No.2 performance...T_T



That was the very first classical piece that totally enraptured me.....usually i tend to nod off with classical pieces because i didn't understand what was going on. But this time the music actually made sense to me (perhaps with the help from the characters' dialogue?). Oh I salute the actual pianist and the orchestra who played this...........for moving me.

The story behind Rachmaninoff writing this piece is actually quite moving. Rachmaninoff had fallen into depression for several years, but he managed to overcome with the help from his doctor. So this concerto was dedicated to his doctor. And the music totally made sense when you knew this story.  Source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Piano_Concerto_No._2_(Rachmaninoff)

And then from there, things just started moving rapidly.

SPOILER ALERT EVERYONE: LAST PART OF NODAME CANTABILE SEASON 1. Don't read if you don't like spoilers.
.

I loved the scene where Nodame hypnotized Chiaki.....and how Chiaki actually fell for it. Really, felt moved when I saw that Chiaki actually trusted (?) Nodame enough to let down his guard. And the story behind his phobia. And Nodame's words. "Daijoubu. Sempai mou hikouki wa noreru." (quote from memory).

AND THE KANI (CRAB) PART WAS JUST HILARIOUS. "Please buy lots of crab for Nodame."

Then Nodame gets serious! Wooh! Her scales are amazing and so fun to watch! They must be so difficult to play = =||||

I like to see Nodame when she's serious. (I like her being weird too.................orangutan.....gyahahahaha-gyabo- o) I already found myself making the mouse mouth ( =3=)... perhaps soon i'll start saying gyaboh~! and buki~~ not that i'm not already making funny sounds myself ;P adding to my nonsense vocab i guess

I enjoyed seeing Chiaki when he starts missing and thinking about Nodame and getting all worked up about her. It is realistic....two years of seeing each other all the time.....and really interacting with one another.....would really build a relationship.

And then I liked Nodame's hometown and family alot. (i liked Chiaki's family arc too lol). Hahaha rural hometown and warm family home is always close to my heart, even though my own hometown isn't exactly "rural"~kind of rural but it's a town and not a farmland even though a river runs right along it. And it's enjoyable to hear the Kyuushuu? accent.

I also liked how Nodame stood up on her own......I usually don't see the main protagonist stand up on her own without getting some kind of help or emotional push from other main characters. Particularly here where its a female character and a strong male character. I actually expected Chiaki to have to shake Nodame to wake her up, but contrary to my expectations, Nodame recovered on her own (perhaps with the love and accceptance of her family :))!

And Chiaki, instead of being disappointed of being robbed of his chance to be macho yelling at Nodame (which I had been expecting), he smiles calmly to himself and hugs Nodame from the back!

"Pass the exam before you say all that."

For some reason, this scene really touched me (yes until i had to write a blog post about it). I can't remember any hugs from the back that i liked as much as this. Suki desu. I think my heart was with Chiaki when he hugged Nodame.......it's like "once was lost, but now found."....a culmination of gladness after all that anxiety............

So simple. So clean. So wonderful.

And then I'm so happy that they put the comics in the ending credits. It was actually a very effective way of telling the aftermath story that ppl want to know without overshadowing the more essential part of the story.


* * *
In retrospect, why i was so moved by this kind of relationship is perhaps due to my preferred language of love - XX and YY (not going to give out my secrets so easily ~ but i might've mentioned them in one of my previous posts. (http://www.5lovelanguages.com/)

:)

So that's all i'm gonna say for today. it's crazy i wonder if i should go to choir tomorrow.

erm...sorry for another emo post

my superego is fed up with her job and flung her paper fan on the table and ran away on vacation without her cell phone.

hence, id and ego have been running rampant all over the place.

i think. since second quarter physics.

sad to say, i was happier with david taylor (first quarter physics) class. i found it more interesting and more relaxing (more spoon-feedy?).

andrew rivers is nice, but his style is more exam-oriented and making points (as compared to taylor's story-telling style). and there's conceptual questions on exams! T_T i hate those.

i have a final coming up on tuesday, and still, i am here, just finished my nodame 10 ep marathon. before that i was on gakuen alice manga marathon since erm, thursday? (finally was forced to stop at the last chapter uploaded on mangafox). i had not intended to go that far (intended to stop at the end of a major arc but i succumbed). i even finished random walk manga (i thought it was not my type of manga -.-). now i'm even desiring to go on further with nodame even though its 12.09am and i have a quiz at 9am tomorrow. not to mention that i plan to attend office hours at 8.15am, which means i prolly need to wake up at 7.35am.

even though i know that enjoyment of nodame wouldn't be as nice as if i spread it out a little more.

and yes, i have not prepared for the quiz. why am i saying yes? i should say no.

"Hey, if superego is not around what's up with all this blaming and accusing?"

Superego is travelling back through space. Ego has finally decided to call for superego.

Superego and Ego Maria, please calm Id down and lock her up somewhere in a cage until I've kicked ass on my Physics 2 Final ok? I beg you.

I will be a good girl and study. The reason why everyone says i'll do fine and i'll do great is because they believe that i work hard as i've been doing up until now.

Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuhh. I really have been going berserk/out of control in these past few weeks. I finished Gakuen Alice's 17 volumes (Fri-today), Random Walk 3 volumes (yesterday), a few eps of School Rumble 2(fri) and 10 eps of Nodame (today). Last weekend I managed to finish Shinshi Doumei Cross manga in 1 saturday night (slept at X.XXam) and i had a midterm on Sunday. Luckily i did well (it is very weird).

I am really stupid. I should be able to manage my impulsive behavior better. That is my weakness I need to deal with. It could be my strong point (intense bursts in short time), but not that practical in the long run.

I realized recently why i'm so poor at delaying gratification. That's because i reward myself for poor behavior (for example, letting myself going berserk on anime and manga marathons before doing homework or doing dishes or even showering), whereas I 'reward' myself with more homework when I get into the mood of studying (because i always feel that once i'm on a roll i should do as much as I can. Thanks to this 'positive' reinforcement, I've become such a lazy and impulsive and immature girl.

How long will things go well like this? How long will God (?), if it is him doing all this, spoiling me?

When will I grow up?

I know that it's probably just this summer. I won't behave so haphazardly once the school year starts. One thing i am worried about is living in a single room -- i've grown to depend on social facilitation, ie having others around to 'watch' me so I'll behave better and focus more on studying. Judging from my behavior when my roommate (the NU one) is away from the room and my behavior in my single room now.......it seems that i really lack backbone and concentration when I'm "safe" in my room. Even when I open the door.

Distractions distractions. I guess my heart is just not in Physics. But I will make it so. For the time being. I will win you over again, my first wife (for the summer season) Physics. I'm sorry I neglected you unfairly. Please treat me better and make me love you.

***
Disclaimer: I am not insane. I am only rather "creative" and "imaginative" =_,= just kidding. This is the regular stuff that goes on in my cotton-stuffed-brain.

Don't panic after reading all that. I just like to let out my frustrations, and then I can move on without lingering regrets tying me down. Trust me. I know I will do my best. I want to.

A few tips for the newbie cooks from the idiot cook

1. Green Vegetables wilt, even in the fridge. Their leaves begin to turn black/brown after about 1.3 weeks, and by the end of 2 weeks they are almost dead.
-examples of veggies that wilt in 1-2 weeks (ie my poor veggies): Cucumbers, Baby bok choy, Spinach, Lettuce, Dou4 Miao2 (esp after opening).
- Their level of decay is sped up once unsealed.
- Even faster if left exposed.

2. Potatoes turn reddish within a day without their skins even in the fridge.

3. Don't forget to thaw your meat. If you are not available to bring out the meat to thaw 2 (?) hours before cooking, thaw it in the fridge.

4.  Corn flour is good for tenderizing meat.

5. Cut your meat into small pieces (ie thin and short). Easier to cook through and easier to eat too.

6. Meat tends to expand a little after cooking.

7. Veggies shrivel after cooking.

8. Eat your food while hot. They taste so much better that way.

9. Put more water when cooking rice if you like your rice soft (esp with American brand rice). Thai jasmine rice probably don't need that much.

10. Regular fried rice is best done with dry rice.

11. A lettucehead has lots of lettuce in it.

Ijou desu. Go to study physics!

after note

and after all that talk about being bored...

I realized after finishing my (sweet sour pork) dinner that i had promised to go help out at Sheil for an event which was at 6.30 O_O noooooooo Tim (Sheil Campus Minister & a very nice and helpful guy) is going to be disappointed with me - my image of reliability is gonna be broken aiks <- hypocrisy alert!

but i forgot to tell you guys that i sang in the official Sheil choir for the first time today! (after gaining some confidence with Cantamus =3) Angela (Director of Liturgy and Music at Sheil) was so cute (i never knew grownup acting cute would be so pleasing to watch! Once a Diva, always a diva... aah Angela's charm has increased by 70% in my eyes *__*) Err...cantamus is more fun i think, and i don't think i contributed much to the choir, but i will try doing it for the rest of the summer. Probably not in the fall - if i can get into H.I.S. =)

What the heck am I doing?! I have a Physics Quiz tomorrow =.=" I was supposed to start studying an hour ago! Study Study Study!!!!!!!

I will try going to the library at night (i will use the shuttle to travel to my apt, don't worry) [just found out library closes at 10pm and not 9pm as i previously thought] in an attempt to curb my laziness!!